Epiphany

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Things have been rough around here, to say the least, but I've really been taking inventory of myself and the resources available to me. I can believe I slipped back into old habits but I'm disappointed that I did it. I was vegging out on the couch the other day and came across a movie on the Lifetime Movie Network called "Queen Sized". I scrolled over to get the details of the movie to see what it was about (at first I thought it was going to be about Queen Latifah). It was about an overweight high school girl running for homecoming queen.

I hit record so I could watch it in its entirety when the boys weren't around (I don't like watching movies when they're around because they get loud and rambunctious because they don't like what I'm watching). Anyway, I watched it this morning when they were gone and it was a great movie! Nikki Blonsky plays Margaret Baker, the overweight girl and her mother is played by Annie Potts. The "popular" girls nominate her for homecoming queen as a joke but Maggie follows through with it, despite all the pranks trying to embarrass her. Talk about inspiring! 

There's a point where Maggie comes to a realization that she's the one who thinks there's something wrong with her. While I was watching this I thought, "OMG, I do that!" It was then that I realized I'm the one who's always saying there's something wrong with me. My weight is not a disability and I'm not going to let it keep me from anything I want. So what if I weigh 265 pounds; I'm not going to be this size forever. So what if it takes 3 years to hit my goal weight; at least I did it.

I'm not doing this anymore. I'm the only person who can change the way I feel about and see myself. If I want to change, I have to make the decision to change and stick with it. If I want something, I'm going to get it, one way or another. It's that simple. And, that, my friends, was my epiphany. 

If you haven't seen the movie, I highly recommend it. Check it out on iTunes.